Wednesday, October 16, 2019

The NBA's Chinagate


Daryl Morey, general manager of the Houston Rockets, tweeted support for the protestors in Hong Kong.  This set off a series of retaliatory actions from China which threatened to undermine the NBA’s relationship with China.  This also jeopardized a great deal of money as the NBA is very popular in China.  Morey offended the Chinese by his tweet.  This whole episode underlines the problem we have when dealing with China.  In short, our problem when we deal with China is we are not strong enough about our values.

There is something to be said for behaving while a guest in someone’s house.  So I can understand if the NBA and its players said nothing politically while in China.  In other words, I’m willing to leave it up to the NBA to decide whether they keep silent or not.  Having said this, let’s imagine the Berlin Olympics in 1936 and let’s pretend the athletes attending knew what the Nazis were doing to the Jews (note the concentration camps were not instituted yet but persecution was definitely taking place).  Would we feel comfortable to remain silent?  I raise this only to illustrate that it is not always easy to determine whether to stand up for your beliefs, or behave as a guest in someone’s house.

Morey tweeted while in the United States.  There is something we need to make extremely clear to China.  In our house, we say what we want, when we want, and how we want.  If that offends you, shove it.  In China, you are not allowed to have your own opinion.  You must agree with the dickhead dictator running the place or else.  Their government monitors people and punishes descent.  That is what despotic dictators do and have always done.    Anyone who says anything the dictator does not like offends.  So china expects us to be careful what we say in our own country.  Not happening. 

I’m not going to argue here that freedom and democracy are better than Chinese Communism.  I’ll save that for another time.  What I will argue is this.  It is about time we stopped worrying about offending China with what we say or do in our own house.  In the USA people are allowed to have different opinions than the ruling government.  We are allowed to express those opinions without fear of punishment.  And by and large, this ideal is upheld.  That is our way of life.  It offends us when someone tells us to shut up in our own house. 

The Chinese were offended by Morey’s tweet because they are not used to our way of life and our freedom of expression.  They don’t understand that to disagree is OK.  Most of them have never lived in an environment in which that is OK.  In short, they don’t know any better.  But they need to learn.  If they choose or are forced to continue to live by the rules of their dictatorship that is a separate issue.  But they need to understand we don’t live by those rules and have no desire to.  The Chinese government reacted as they did because exposing their citizens to our way of thinking is a threat to their rule.    But in a society in which global communication is the norm, they just need to get used to it.  And if they can’t, too bad for them.


Sunday, October 13, 2019

Totally Random Rugby World cup


Totally Random Rugby World Cup
Hello Rugby Union fans across the globe.  It is now time for what you have been waiting for.  Forget the real matches.  It’s time for the Totally Random Rugby World Cup.  The results are purely based on random numbers.  Merit, form, world ranking, or weather don’t matter here.
I was too lazy to do this for all of the group matches.  Now that the dross has gone home from Japan, there are only eight teams left so here we go.

Quarterfinals

The Wallabies have not exactly lit the world up with their form of late so England goes in as the favorites.  Of course, since this is completely random, that doesn’t matter.  And it doesn’t matter here.  The sleeping giant from down under erupts with a stunning 44-20 victory over England.  First Australia retains the Ashes, then they knock England out.  Those sweet chariots known as airplanes will be taking England back home early.
Poor Ireland, a team whose fans had so much hope, must face the might of the All Blacks.  Through some miracle, New Zealand is held to just 10 points as Ireland roll 34-10.  Now that really is stunning, but in the Totally Random World Cup, dreams have a 50% chance of coming true.
On Sunday Wales finally puts France out of their misery 42-16.  Les Bleus have been Les Sluggish and now mercifully, they are out and can regroup for the Six Nations.  Meanwhile Japan have had a really good run as the host nation.  Four years ago, they stunned South Africa.  Can they do it again?  No.  The home team is out in a close game 20-12.

The Semi Finals (pronounced sem-eye) of course


Can Ireland continue their Cinderella ride in the World Cup against the suddenly in form Wallabies?  No.  Australia, now fully awake wins a high scoring 41-30 affair knocking the Irish out.
In the other semi-final, Wales continues their good form bouncing South Africa 25-9.  They say what goes around comes around.  Are the 80’s coming back? 

The Final

There is a third place match and no one cares.  For the record, Ireland take 3rd with a 38-25 victory over South Africa.
But everyone’s attention turns to the finals.  Australia has come out of nowhere whereas Wales was always considered a dark horse contender.  In the finals, Australia finish off Wales easily 32-14 in one of their most surprising World Cup wins.  So there you have it.  The Totally Random world champions are the mighty Wallabies.  Let’s hope the real matches are as entertaining and I hope someone knocks off New Zealand.  I don’t hate New Zealand at all; I just want something different.


Monday, September 9, 2019

The 2019 NRL Totally Random Finals


The 2019 NRL Totally Random Finals
Now that the NRL season has finally finished, it’s time for the completely random NRL finals.  Merit, home field, past performance, psychology have nothing to do with this analysis.  The results are based purely on random number generation with no other factors.  With that in mind, let’s go.

Round 1

In round 1 the Roosters keep on going with a high scoring 44-28 win over the Rabbitohs.  Just because the word Rabbitohs is not in my spell checker doesn’t mean they aren’t a viable premier, but in round 1, they go down to arguably the best team going.
In the random universe, top of the table Storm has a 50/50 chance of winning and in this case, they are blown away by the Raiders 24-38.  Well the Raiders did beat them in Melbourne not too long ago.
Both the Storm and the Rabbitohs live to fight another day though.  This cannot be said for the Sharks and the Broncos.  The Sharks go down to the Sea Eagles in a low scoring drop goal decided thriller 9-8.  Meanwhile the Eels squeak by the Broncos 22-20 and I’m sure controversy rages regarding a penalty that was given that should not have been.

Round 2

The horror finals continue for the Storm who go down to Manly 20-28.  Wow, the random universe is cruel.  Now Melbourne will have to focus on AFL which, somehow, I don’t think will be too difficult for them.  The Rabbitohs, now part of my Word dictionary, do take advantage of their second chance to squeak by the Eels 8-6. 

Preliminary Finals

The Raiders, freaked out by their unexpected win over the Storm, cannot handle being this close to glory.  Meanwhile the Rabbitohs, thankful to be part of a Microsoft Word dictionary and therefore having their existence acknowledged by the tech giant, move into the Grand Final with a convincing 46-14 win over the poor Raiders.
Meanwhile the beat goes on for the Roosters who will defend their premiership after a 34-0 whitewash of the Sea Eagles.  Goodbye Sea Eagles.  Somehow, I doubt people in NSW are too upset by this.

The Storm Free Grand Final

This sets up a Storm free Grand Final consisting of teams from NSW.  People did not realize this was possible and news broadcasts are full of the shock experienced by the general population as a result of this once in a life time event.  The people of that state are just glad the Storm are gone and don’t care who wins.  But I suppose more are going for the underdog Rabbitohs than the defending champions.  For those people, their wish comes true.  The Roosters, for some reason, decide not to show up as the Rabbitohs romp 48-4.  What an achievement.
And there you have it, the 2019 Totally Random champs are the Rabbitohs.  With all that said, let the real games begin and Go Storm!



Monday, September 2, 2019

2019 totally Random AFL Finals


Totally Random AFL Finals
Hello AFL fans.  It’s the time you have all been waiting for, The 2019 Totally Random AFL Finals.  This is completely random.  Merit, form, home field have nothing to do with the results.  Let the chaos begin.

The First Round

The finals begin with the Cats continuing their recent trend of dismal finals performances going down to the Magpies in a big way 140-82. 
The Eagles are vastly favored against the Bombers.  Still smarting from their shock home loss against the Hawks that knocked them out of the top four, this do or die clash should see them back to their winning ways.  But no, the Eagles will not be defending their 2018 premiership as the Bombers completely trash the Eagles 154-68.  Who could have seen that coming.
Three weeks earlier, the Bulldogs went up to Western Sydney and humiliated the Giants.  The rematch, however, does not follow that pattern.  The Giants live for another week with a grinding 83-74 win eliminating the Bulldogs who join the Eagles on the scrap heap.
The Tigers beat the Lions at the MCG in round 23.  They ride a nine game winning streak and are hot favorites against the Lions who have little finals experience.  But the Lions, who have been underestimated all year, shine with a 151-60 win over the Tigers.  My goodness what a beat down.
All three cat family teams entered the finals for the first time I think in living memory and two of the three are in trouble with only the Lions winning through to the preliminary final.

Round 2

The Cats rebound against the Bombers with a thumping 60 point win 137-77.  The Bombers did well to last this long, but they too land on the scrap pile of 2019.
Meanwhile the Giants have been inconsistent all year.  They return to the MCG to play the Tigers and the Tigers redeem themselves with a 107-43 win eliminating the Giants.

Preliminary Finals

In a high scoring thriller, the Lions win their last home game of the year 135-120 over the Cats.  We may have seen some Cats for the last time but the Lions are roaring.
Meanwhile we see a preliminary final rematch between the Magpies and the Tigers.  This time the Magpies had a week off while the Tigers had to play an extra game against the Giants.  Last year Mason Cox destroyed the Tigers but he’s not here.  No problem for the Magpies.  They nail the Tigers again 133-98.  It looks like the Magpies have the Tigers Number.

So it’s the Lions and the Magpies in the Grand Final.

The Grand Final

The Magpies are here once again after losing a close one in the dying minutes to the Eagles last year.  Will Magpies fans experience the top of the mountain for the first time in nine years, or will Lions fans taste victory for the first time in 16 years?
In a slog, the young Lions roar once more completing a 75-54 win over the Magpies who once again come oh so close to glory but fall short.
This just goes to show you that in the totally random universe, anything can happen.  Congratulations to the Brisbane Lions, the 2019 Totally Random premiers.  It’s party time both for Brisbane fans, and for the rest of us minus Magpie fans who take comfort in the misery of Magpie supporters two years in a row.  If your team can’t win, seeing Magpie fans suffer is really the next best thing.



Saturday, January 5, 2019

2018 Totally Random NFL Playoffs

Totally Random NFL Playoffs

At last the NFL season is over. 17 weeks of hard hitting football comes to an end leaving 12 teams in what is commonly known of as “the tournament.” Experts and fans will analyze this week’s Wild Card Weekend to death in order to project winners and margins of victory.  But here, it is the Totally Random NFL Playoffs.  Nothing is considered.  Home field means nothing.  Offensive and Defensive statistics mean nothing.  Even the fact that I am a diehard Cowboys fan means nothing.  The results are completely random.  So who wins the Super Bowl with this criteria?  Let’s find out.

Wild Card Weekend

We begin with the Indianapolis Colts going against the Houston Texans.  In the real world, the Colts might be the hottest team going and this transfers into our random tournament as they defeat the Texans in a low scoring game in which both offenses struggle.  Final random score is 17-8 Colts.
Next we have the game I’ve been waiting for.  The Seahawks against the Cowboys.  In the regular season the Hawks nailed the Cowboys 24-13 back before we got Cooper and could barely score.  Unfortunately for me, in this random world, the Cowboys offense which has been inconsistent all year, manages a whopping 3 points while the Seahawks score 26.  Well that was a disappointment.  Cowboys out in the random tournament.
We next have a rematch between the Chargers and the Ravens.  In the first contest the Ravens went to LA and beat the Chargers 22-10 in a pretty close game.  Here, it’s not even close.  The Chargers smash the Ravens 47-3.  Wow what a blowout.
You would think the Eagles and the Bears would be low scoring, but now that the Eagles have a QB they like, anything can happen.  And it does here.  The bears finally have a good team and they win in a shootout 47-24.  The miracle Eagles are finally gone and as a Cowboys fan, I’m happy about that.  I’m still bitter over the hated Eagles winning last year’s Super Bowl.

Divisional Round

With Wild Card Weekend out of the way we get to the heart of the playoffs.  As the 6th place team the Colts get to travel to the Chiefs.  No problem.  Maybe there was a blizzard as happened in the 1995 season when the 15-1 Chiefs lost 10-7 against the Colts and were out.  This time the Colts win easily 20-3. 
The Seahawks, feeling good about themselves after beating America’s team find out why the Saints are hard to be in that dome of theirs.  It’s not even close as the Saints roll 41-5. 
New England always does well in the playoffs.  They are coming off a bye, but the Chargers are the team nobody wants to play.  In another snow storm the Chargers blank the Patriots 14-0.  Will this be the end of the dynasty?  All the Patriots’ weaknesses are exposed as the Chargers roll on to the AFC Championship game against the hot Colts.
Meanwhile in the NFC the Saints are joined in the NFC Championship round by the Rams who defeat the Bears in a low scoring thriller 16-13.  What a game.

Championship Weekend

So we have the Colts and the Chargers in the AFC, the 6th and 5th teams.  This is why the Random playoffs are so great.  But in the NFC it’s all chalk.  It’s the first and second place teams going at it.
The Chargers don’t really have a home field advantage and this shows as the amazing Colts roll on 4r1-17.  That offensive line of theirs is great and the Chargers just cannot stop Andrew Luck.
Meanwhile in an instant classic, the LA Rams upset the Saints in New Orleans 29-24.  This game goes back and forth but in the end, the Rams somehow manage to do what everyone said could not be done.
So we have a Colts vs. Rams Super Bowl.

Super Bowl LIII

Can’t we just use real numbers instead of this Roman garbage?  Anyway, this is a Super Bowl no one really saw coming.  Could the Colts ride this hot streak to win the big one or will the Rams, who started off as everyone’s  darlings, finish as well as they started?
The Colts have played big games coming into the playoffs, and then lots of road wins to get to the Super Bowl.  All that takes a toll and they finally run out of gas.  The Rams win easily 34-8.
So Congratulations to the LA Rams, this year’s Totally Random Super Bowl winners.